Friday, May 4, 2007


I feel like screaming.
But that would just be pointless.
And probably make the dogs bark.
I've got like 5 different emotions going on at once.
I'm...sad? hurt? confused.
My friends suck. I feel used. Rarely does anyone talk to me without there being something they want me to do for them. Which then makes me wonder..Well I hope it isn't ME. There's gotta be something wrong if they only ever talk when they need something. It makes a person wonder if there's something wrong with them.
But...once you get over that...I'm annoyed.
I can't take anymore ''I'm right, You're wrong" ...Anymore people sounding like 10 year olds when they argue (No offence to any ten year olds, I'm sure you're much more mature than they are...I could probably guarantee it). Or people RIGHT there. Constantly. I feel like I cant breathe (that COULD have something to do with the smoke.).
And then...Life's pretty good.
I get to hang out with Krissy. She's probably the coolest person ever. Well, ok, Next to you mom. And also one of the few friends who doesn't ask anything of me, at all. I got here thinking she really wouldn't like me.. But then, the second time I hang out with her...And I'm cracking up because she just let out a burp that put me to shame. (HEY! I have an excuse, I grew up around boys.)  I love going over to her house, My aunt always says to me ''Hey beautiful!'' and gives me a kiss on the cheek. My Abuelito does that too. I love it. I missed it!! Plus their house has good energy. Here, It just feels draining.
I think I'm going crazy. They better not have me end up in the room with the cushy walls. And if they do, The better pay for it!
Onceyou get over the bad feelings, I'm happy here. I have something to look forward to. I have fun.
Now if we could just find a house, and my hair was free of the smoke smell, Life would be freakin awesome.
And just randomly.. this makes me laugh.


brainwhispers said...

rooms with cushioned walls are coool.
I have 2 empty rooms in my house and often think about decorating one like that.
A nice white padded cell for me to go a bit "funny" in

amy122389 said...

For a second, I thought Brain was gonna offer us a room.  I woulda been packing my bags quicker than....quicker than....okay, well....really quickly.

love you.... you guys are the only thing keeping me sane...


frankandmary said...

No 17 yr old fantastic birthday entry? Don't the Amish allow that? ~ Mary