Saturday, September 13, 2008

"But I'm the godmother!!"

This is my excuse for stealing the baby all the time :)
And spoiling her rotten.
Shes growing up already :(
She smiles and giggles and she doesn't cry when I hold her. Often. And when she does I go "ahhhhh" and she stops...Its pretty funny.
Shes gassy.
Shes still perfect.
Me on the other hand...I've been better.
I've been getting...panic attacks? I don't know.
Yesterday I had a real shitty day at work, And I came home and I was just tired and hungry, and when I was explaining it all to my parents I broke down. Just a few tears at first, then it got uncontrollable. I was shaking and sobbing and I couldn't breath and I felt numb. Then I got even more upset cause as much as I tried I couldn't stop and that just made it worse.
As much as I sleep its never enough.
Work is sucking, all my work buddies left. And they don't wanna hire more people which means I get more hours and while yeah cool more money...I really don't want to be there any more than I already am. I don't NEED the job, I just have it to get me outta the house. 
After that there isn't to much going on.
I've made a new friend. His name is Gil. I figure I should get that out there, If He's gonna be a part of my life you'll hear more of him and Don't want you to be all "who?"
He's hot. Just saying.... :-0
I have a psychiatrist appointment on Monday, Because like my mother, I am crazy. Only I have insomnia also. They put me on Lexapro but If I'm going thru what I'm going thru I don't think its working very well. And the sleeping pills stopped working, Actually they aren't even sleeping pills. I don't remember what they are but basically its just to calm me down, not put me to sleep.
I guess I'm done, not to much else is going on...Right now we are watching Zely so I'm gonna go steal her from mom....Cause I'm the godmother!! :)


amy122389 said...

my poor honey.  :-(



brainwhispers said...

Maybe you need to take up smoking and drinking. That will sort you out.
Ok, so bad suggestion.
I would suggest a nice walk along the canal, then up onto the old town railway line for a stroll to the end and back, then back onto the canal, under the bridge and go sit on the bench and watch the ducks and swans for a while. But thats too far for you really isnt it. :o) I mean the plane journey alone will probably take the best part of half a day. Then there is the bus service from Heathrow. That will take a good few hours to get here. And then you have to walk from the bus station in my town to the canal, which would take about 40 minutes. By this time you will be absolutely shattered...and pennyless from the cost of travel.
Ok so thats a stupid suggestion too.

topazscorpio27 said...

All baby's are cute or so I'm told but your goddaughter is really beautiful Ryan!  Enjoy her because you say she's all ready growing?!  My godson is 6 now and I can remember the day he was born!  -D-